[The Seal of the Scapegoat Society]

Our Philosophy:

Blame can be a good thing. However, it can only go so far. In the end blame will not change what has happened. Our society spends too much energy on assigning blame. In doing so its wastes resources (time, money, political interest) that could be going to far more important things, such as fixing whatever is wrong. Therefore the Scapegoat Society accepts all blame. For everything.

Blame Us -- We Did It

It wasn't the oppresion of the upper class. It wasn't foreign terrorists. It wasn't Bill Gates. It was us.

What We've Done:

awsmyth@mccoy.cs.twsu.edu writes:
I take the blame for the destruction of the ozone layer. I personally, and with great malice, transported megatons of ozone from over Antarctica, and droped the whole bloody mass half a mile above LA.

ender@asu.edu writes:
I, with a little assistance from my simian associates, did willfully create and propagate the AIDS virus. I calculated that the best vector of transmission was through a despised and hated minority and so I infected bisexuals, to aid the spread (pun intented) to the straight community, and then devoted my efforts to infect the homosexual community.
Knowing that fear and loathing would keep a majority of the heterosexual community from even looking at the problem, I knew my plan would overcome nearly all obstacles. However I must also show my gratitude to the American governement and the american national blood banks, for without their tacit consent to ignore the signals of a new disease I would have had a monumental task in creating a widespread disease.

bruced@ieaway.com writes:
I would like to take the blame for the national debt. I took 30 billion dollars ( or whatever the hell it is now god knows I can't keep track ) and I spent it all on shoes and hair care products. sorry

michael@unc.edu writes:
Thing for which I take the blame: Lag. All of it. All the lag on all the MOOs, most especially Lambda but also all the other ones in existence (even the ones on which I have no character--where it's particularly bad and even more my fault). Every last bit, every wasted second spent waiting on that @whopals to go through, every tick which gave its life for naught--it's all my doing. Now fix it.

lancer@ieway.com writes:
put me down as to blame for repubican revolution in congress. it's my fault newt gingrich is the speaker of the house and that he has a bad hair cut.

Sillyputty writes:
i am, in fact, immortal. i didn't want anyone to find out, so i've kept the fact that i was the one on the grassy knoll in texas a secret for years. i killed JFK and i admit it. my fault, everyone can shut up about it already.

behl3313@uwwvax.uww.edu writes:
Despite what history books may say, /I/ am the creator of all drugs. Not only did I create them, but I also went on an international tour on a mission to visit schoolyards everywhere and distribute my goods to defenseless young children. I also constructed all the boats used in smuggling drugs in from foreing countries. I, the creator of drugs, take the blame of babies born already addicted to crack and elevated levels of crime. *sob* Please don't tell my mom.

saunderp@kew.starway.net.au writes:
Okay, I own up!! I am to blame for the internet being so slow in Australia, I am the one hogging up all the time on the net, I've tried to stop myself, but then if I didn't do it, someone else would, so blame me Australia!!!

redfive@habit.com writes:
I take responsibility for the creation of the human race. I'm terribly sorry, please don't send too much hate mail.

wes@iquest.com writes:
I have done my best to make sure that no one, anywhere, at any time has ANYTHING good to do. I have taken great pains to insure that complacency, apathy, and letheargic behavior are perferred to creativity, energy, and dynamic thought processes. You wonder why there is nothing good to do in your home town? It's me. I made sure that cops bust parties, that groups of people are considered dangerous, and that any place that slips through my fingers gets shut down for mismanagement within months. I'm the reason your dance club still plays the Macarena. I'm the reason your coffee house won't let you play magic. I'm the reason Magic killed Role Playing! Oh, and before you go rushing off to Atlanta, New York, or LA thinking things are better there... I made them suck, too.

ceg4@rabbit.INS.CWRU.Edu writes:
I am to blame for the epidemic better known as 'death'. Since time immemorial, I have ensured that the life functions of everything cease after a given amount of time. Because of me, billions of humans have ceased existing, and trillions more of other creatures. Because of me, the death rate remains at %100 of living things, despite trillions spent worldwide to prevent this terrible condition.

bub@cyberscream.com writes:
My sincerest apologies. I am personally (with the help of a well organized secret society) responsible for the resurgence of pop. We spent long nights requesting the worst that the 80's had to offer and whispered the mantra of Hanson to children in their sleep. I also take full responsibilty for the Spice Girls, though the details are to grisly to catalogue here.

Submit your own confession here.


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